Critique Group Catastrophe

Recently I spoke about how I might have to drop from the children’s writers critique group due to a member rejoining and her sidekick, the vomit bucket. 

She has yet to show, which is a good thing, as most thought she wouldn’t anyway. But now a new issue or group of issues has risen.

For starters I missed some meeting about ”Making Your Critique Group Better,” over the weekend. So a few people from group have some kind of new critique knowledge, that I apparently don’t have.

Secondly because there are no published authors in our group (oh well I guess no one is counting all my magazine publications!!) our group is suffering and we must change it up, because all the groups with published authors do it differently.

Third there is some high and mighty member that is returning and she is soooo good that we have to work around her schedule apparently. Note that she won’t be staying with us for long because she will probably start her own group…then why bother switch everything around?!?!

Next we are going to be setting limits, and guidelines, and positive point, negative points, much like an intense college class.

In addition, the day and time will change, and I will probably not be able to make it to these meetings now. I have, however, been told my ability to make it matters.

Maybe some of this is stemming from people frustrated that they haven’t been published…I can understand, but as a writer you have to know the percentage of likelihood that you will even get published is incredibly low. You have to write for yourself first and that makes a your story great.

I took a leap of faith back in October and joined this group for fun, to get out of the house, and to improve my writing…All it has brought me lately is stress and frustration…We are all adults, this really shouldn’t be happening! I’m just very upset, because I like all the people in my group and it feels like it’s falling apart!!!!!!

The Long Process…

I’ve been busy working on a middle grade level book for over the past five years. While it has received some excellent feedback from editors, it isn’t quiet where it needs to be, hence the continued rejection letters.

It’s making the rounds in my critique group and that has helped find a lot of errors and really tightened it up, overall.

It feels like it’s never going to be where it needs to be, something will always need to be edited. And editing it has proven to be rather difficult, this millionth time through, although I’m getting some great new ideas to throw into chapters.

The book is fiction, but it relies on historical points, such as historical dates and architecture. If I don’t properly represent these in the book then it won’t be creditable and it won’t be something I’m proud of even if an editor looks past the flaws.

With a huge cast of characters, that only show up one time, taking place in a huge house old house, I have a lot to remember and organize.

Back when I started I had constructed a long time line to keep track of all these little things, but pulling it once again from the file cabinet and going through all my notes, I realize I have no idea what I wrote down! My timeline and notes are hideous. And my pencil drawings for each character all look the same now.

But I’m determined to figure it all out…finish it up and send it off. Even if I have to cover my walls AGAIN with every index card on file!

Frustrations

What has happened? I have no idea! If I knew I could surely fix it.

A part of me wants to get in my car and drive away, while another part of me wants to go to bed and not wake up.

I have felt like this before, when I would grow frustrated and tired with a family I was nannying for, or a job that I simply had enough of. Or life just being…life…

My dogs, my life, my writing, my homework, my housework are all driving me nuts, sending me into a yelling frenzy!!

And to top it off, I have to drop from my writing critique group I have been going to since last October, because the group is getting too big and not everyone will be able to have their work looked at but every two months! TWO MONTHS!!!! Oh and the small, well large for me, factor, of a person returning who apparently carries a throw-up bucket with them because they throw-up so much because of anxiety or something. I have a paralyzing fear of throwing up or being around it, so…there goes my group.

But I have food, shelter, and healthcare, so I really shouldn’t be frustrated with anything, but yet I feel like a person ready to explode.

Even right now, as I type this, my puppy is having an argument with the door-stop…PLEASE STOP!!!!! And this is after I already mopped up his water bowl mess!!! (He decided it was a swimming pool)